


rest in peace, underoos

by icymapletree



Series: 13 nights of halloween [4]
Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies)
Genre: Angst, Autumn, Canonical Character Death, Gen, Grieving, Halloween, Post-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), Tony Stark Needs a Hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-12
Updated: 2019-10-12
Packaged: 2020-12-09 12:29:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,112
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20994824
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/icymapletree/pseuds/icymapletree
Summary: It was a crisp October day when Peter Parker crumbled to ash in space.Everything always comes back to that day.orThe anniversary of the Snap different amounts of time later, as Tony Stark deals with grief.





	rest in peace, underoos

**Author's Note:**

> warning: temporary canonical character death is made seem permanent - but later down the line, Peter would be blipped back :)
> 
> written for #28: RIP on [hailingstars](https://hailing-stars.tumblr.com/) 13 nights of halloween prompt list!

It was a crisp October day when Peter Parker crumbled to ash in space.

The same day, a year later, Tony Stark created The Peter Parker Foundation.

A week before Titan, Peter had expressed to Tony how much he loved fall. Now, everywhere Tony went, he saw shadows of the boy he lost. It didn’t feel right, to have waves of grief wash over him like a tsunami when he had a newborn to take care of. But Pepper understood how loss hurt so much more after the fact. The numbness was gone, and it left room for all-consuming pain.

It had been Bruce’s suggestion to create the charity, to give a home to the love he still felt for his dead kid. Pepper loved the idea, and it had been endorsed by the company board almost immediately. She insisted on him not doing a speech - but Tony was afraid of disappointing Peter, wherever he was.

He didn’t wear a tux - Peter always said they made him look too uptight. He wore a shirt Peter bought for him which was a black shirt with Nicola Tesla and Thomas Edison, with AC/DC printed in block text right below. He paired the shirt with yellow converse that were supposed to be part of his joint Halloween costume with Peter last year (_“We should be candy corn for Halloween - even though May says it’s, like, the grossest thing in existence!”_).

The tower was a quick drive away, but Tony couldn’t remember how he got there or who drove him. He still owned Avengers Tower, mostly because the purchase fell through - and though he wouldn’t have admitted it before, he was glad it did because it meant Peter was close by. He still remembers Peter’s face when he told him he was staying, it was painted pink with a blush and shocked all the same (_“Is business better up here or something?” “That, and you’re around.” “Oh, uh, cool.”_).

Pepper introduced him as a speaker with the poise she usually did, but Tony lacked all of his normal charisma. His hair stuck up in every direction, eyes puffy with lack of sleep. He sat on the stool that was set out for him and began to talk, ignoring the keynotes sliding by on the holoscreen above the reporters.

“A year ago, I lost my kid.”

(_“Mr Stark, I don’t feel so good.”_)

“I feel responsible for it, even if I’ve been told it wasn’t my fault. I almost died up there.”

(_“When you can do the things that I can-”_)

“But he died down here.”

(_“I don’t wanna go.”_)

“He pulled me out of a very dark place. And I know he’d want me to do the same for others.”

(_“Yeah, just looking out for the little guy.”_)

“I’d like to announce the creation of The Peter Parker Foundation. It will focus on recovery efforts in a post-Snap world, specifically on displaced children and single parents who are having trouble providing.”

Thunderous applause erupted in the press room. He thought he might have signed off, but Tony couldn’t help but relive Peter’s last moments as he walked off stage.

(_“I’m sorry.”_)

* * *

“Whatcha doing?” Tony asked, looming over Pepper with the New York skyline lit up behind him.

She shut her laptop. “Looking for a new house.”

“Oh. What’s new with… reality?”

Pepper looked at him blankly.

“I, uh, I know what I want to dress Morgan up as for her first Halloween.”

She pursed her lips. “And what are you thinking?”

Tony looked out the window briefly. “I was thinking... a candy corn.”

Pepper tilted her head. “Isn’t that what you and Peter were supposed to go as last year?”

“Uh, yeah, we were.”

Pepper stood up to make eye contact with her husband, placing an arm around him and looking at him with sorrowful eyes.

“You know that Morgan isn’t Peter, right?”

Tony turned his head away from her. “I know,” he sighed. Pepper interlaced her fingers with his.

“You’ve gotta let him rest, Tony. You have to rest.”

* * *

It’s the same day, four years later, when Morgan declared what she was gonna be for Halloween.

Pepper was washing the dishes, humming a little tune. Morgan sat at the table with her colorful plastic plate and matching plastic silverware. She munched on dinosaur chicken nuggets and mac-and-cheese.

Suddenly, Morgan slammed her fist on the table, fork upright in her grip like a pitchfork. “Mommy, I wanna be Peter for Trick-or-Treat!”

Pepper turned off the water and dried her hands with the nearest towel. “You were Spidey last year, Morgie. Don’t you want to mix it up a little?”

She scrunched her face. “But I wanna be Petey. Not Spidey. My friend at school is going as Uncle Steve and I wanna go as a hero, too. Petey’s way mega cooler.”

Pepper considered her daughter for a moment. One might call Morgan’s idolization of her dead surrogate brother slightly alarming - especially when they find out that she’s never met him since he’s been gone longer than she’s been alive.

One thing that Tony had done really well after Morgan’s first birthday was letting Peter rest in peace. He told stories, made Peter’s presence felt, but rarely recounted the kid’s death or had extreme bouts of grief like he used too.

Today was an exception to the rule. Morgan never understood where her daddy went during that lone day in October. Pepper was constantly giving gentle reminders that her daddy needed to be alone today.

“Mommy?” Morgan said, bringing Pepper back to reality.

Nodding, Pepper said, “I think he’d like that costume,” and she wasn’t sure if she was talking about Peter or Tony.

* * *

“Hey buddy.”

(_“Hey buddy, I think you lost this!”_)

“I hope you don’t mind that I came here this year rather than going to the Compound.”

Tony stood shockingly still, his body that was usually full of movement was lagging with the simplest things such as walking. He stared up at a stone slab in a park somewhere in Queens, tracing the names “Peter Parker” and “May Parker” with his gaze.

“This felt more personal.”

(_“I’d rather just stay on the ground for awhile.”_)

Peter’s name was put out front of the compound too, with all the names of the other dusted Avengers. It caused quite the controversy at first, but eventually the news outlets moved on and Tony got to put the name of the youngest warrior up with the others.

But here in Queens, he felt closer to Peter. Like if he looked up, he might see a blur of red and blue.

(_“Call me Spider-Man!”_)

“Rest in peace, Underoos.”

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading!
> 
> come talk to me on [tumblr](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/icymapletree)!


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